Introduction to Jokes a Sardar Would Tell

Introduction to Jokes a Sardar Would Tell

Sardar, is a Persian word which tends to be used for military or political leaders because the roots of the word mean commander, perhaps comparable to the English word, chieftain. 

In Pakistan, for example, the leaders of certain tribes have the title Sardar. [Balochi, Kashmiri, Pashtun, Punjabi, Seraiki, Sindhi].

However, in India the word often refers to a male follower of the Sikh faith; sometimes the word - Ji, is added and this denotes respect. Sometimes, in India, the Punjabi and Hindi: Sardar, is used derogatorily and he is considered as an "idiot" and the butt of many jokes perhaps rather in the same way as "blondes".

These jokes are not meant to be  any form of racism, but we do understand the place of stereotypes in society. On this occasion we feel the same about Sardar humour. We see it rather like the attitude of say the Americans towards the Canadians; the English towards the Irish or the Scots. The Welsh towards the English. Elsewhere we find that "Poms" [British people] are the butt of Australian jokes. Belgians fall foul of the French; while The German deprecate the Dutch in their humour. 

How Can You Be Sure Someone Is A Sardar?

• Sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.
• Tries to drown a fish in water.
• Trips over a cordless phone.
• Thinks socialism means partying.
• Studies for a blood test and fails.
• Gets stabbed in a shoot-out.
• Puts lipstick on his forehead because he wants to make up his mind.
• Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
• At the bottom of the application form where it says: "Sign Here", he puts 'Scorpio'.
• Sells the car for gas money.
• Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
• Drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, "Airport left", he turns around and goes home.
• Gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.

   Funny   Jokes   a   Sardar    Tells   

Two Sardarjis are looking at an Egyptian mummy.

Sardar 1: Look, so many bandages! Must be a pukka (real) lorry accident case.
Sardar 2: Aaho, lorry number is also written...BC 1760!!!

Two Sardars were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1: What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing? 
Sardar 2: Don't worry, I have one more.

Sardar: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but it starts with 'T'.
Sardar: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.


Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue you've broken

Sardar:                            Thank God! I thought it was a new one!



Sardar to his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant:                       It's already raining!

Sardar:                       So what? Take an umbrella and go!

Sardar Out Shopping

Gatnam went to the sale at electrical shop and he found a bargain. 'I would like to buy this small TV,' he told the salesman.
'Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars,' he replied.

So Gatnam hurried home, removed his turban, and changed his hair style and returned to repeat to the salesman, 'I would like to buy this TV.'

'Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars,' the salesman replied for a second time.
'Damn! Gatnam exploded, 'he recognized me.'

He went for a complete disguise this time, haircut, new hair colour, different clothes, big sunglasses and he waited a few days until he saw the salesman again.
'I would like to buy this TV.'

'Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars,' the salesman replied.
Angry now and frustrated, Gatnam shouted, 'How do you know I'm a Sardar?'
'Because that's a microwave,' he replied. 

Santa Has A Funny Dream

Santa kept having the same strange dream every night, so he made an appointment to see a doctor.

Doctor Ajaib: What was your dream about?

Santa: I was being chased by a vampire!

Doctor Ajaib: [smiling to himself] So... what is the scenery like?

Santa: I was running in a hall way.

Doctor Ajaib: Then what happened?

Santa: Well that's the weird thing. In every single dream, the same thing happened. I always come to this door, but I can't open it. I keep pushing the door and pushing the door, but it wouldn't budge!

Doctor Ajaib: Does the door have anything written on it?
Santa: Yes it does.

Doctor: And what do these letters say?

Santa: It says, "Pull."

Santa and The Lottery Ticket

Banta finds himself in considerable trouble. His business has gone bust and he has serious financial concerns. He's so desperate that he decides to ask God for help. He goes into the temple and begins to pray:
'Oh God, please help me, I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well, please let me win the lotto.'

Lotto night arrives and somebody else wins it.

Banta goes back to the temple, 'God, please let me win the lotto, I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well.'

Lotto night comes and Banta still has no luck!! Back to the temple he goes.
'God, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house, my car and my wife and children are starving. I don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to you. Why won't you just let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order?'

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the sky parts open and the Banta is confronted by the voice of the Lord, 'OYE BANTA, YOU HAVE TO BUY THE TICKET FIRST.'

Santa And the Clock

Santa is in Delhi. He is walking on a street which has a Clock Tower when someone asks him if he wants to buy the clock on the Tower. Santa says agrees.

'Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder.' The man took the thousand and disappeared. Having waited for several hours the Santa figures he has been made a fool by that man.

On the next day Santa is again walking along the same street and the same man asks him to buy the clock. 'Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder.'

Santa gives him the thousand and says, 'Oye, I am not a fool. This time, you wait and I'll go get a ladder.'

Santa Visits A Bar

Santa goes into a bar in New York.

The man on his right orders a drink, 'Johnnie Walker, single.'

The man on his left says, 'Jack Daniels, single.'

Santa says. 'Santa Singh, married.'